Acceptable Levels of Fecal Matter

Let me disgust you for a minute… if I can.

I remember when I was a Freshman in high school, one day some of my friends began discussing FDA standards that allow for flies or feces in ice cream.  I had never heard such an idea before.  I didn’t eat ice cream for a week!

What exactly are safe levels of poop in your food?  Well, if you want to know, here is a link that might get you started:

Good luck with that.

Let me ask you this:

What are the acceptable levels of fecal matter in your living room?

Do you have a zero tolerance policy on feces on your sofa?

Really?  You have a policy for this???

I didn’t think so.

How about your church?  What are the acceptable levels of fecal matter where you worship?

We will get back to that.

I have covered this topic before, actually, but it seems pertinent again today at the Agents X household.  (We have foster babies – infants and toddlers.)  And the fact is: people poop.

Potty training:  The yardstick of civilization!

How very important it is to master this business!!!

But you know what?  Incontinence hounds more of us that we care to admit.  As a small child, you need diapers, AND you need someone willing to tend to them for you.  When you are an adult, you can lose control through injury or disease, and there is a good chance you can handle it discreetly, but no doubt would wish for the control.

But EVERYBODY, if they live long enough, will outlive their control at some point.  EVERYBODY.  And a long life is a blessing from God!!!

And so if you have an elderly parent or grandparent living with you, then you know what I mean.

But people living on the streets frequently suffer severe alcoholism, drug addiction, mental illness, OR suffer diseases and injuries that the rest of us risk too, but without the support system or medical attention to help them manage their incontinence discreetly.

Yet if you open your door to the stranger – “the least of these” – in the street (Matt. 25 anyone?) very often, then pretty soon you will discover someone (or more than a few) who struggle to manage their pee-n-poo.  And when you open your sofa to sofa surfers, this means you will adapt to fairly liberal FDA standards of acceptable levels of fecal matter in your home!


But keep in mind this:  On the great day of Judgment when the King separates the goats and the sheep for destruction or salvation, that fecal matter is presented as forensic evidence – submitted by the defense, and may very well sway the Judge to favor you!

Now… What are the acceptable levels of fecal matter where you go to church?




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