One morning I click on the news to see the Chinese dealing with the outbreak of a deadly virus. I fail to catch the name of it at first, but I am reminded that just a few years ago there was a SARS epidemic over there, and they managed to stop it before it went global. In fact, they had a couple… maybe three. I can’t recall them clearly now, but one was Bird Flu and the other Swine Flu.
Bird Flu doesn’t sound so bad, but then I think to myself, yeah… that’s how they get ya. Swine Flu sounds dirty, and I think to myself, well… they are Chinese. Glad that is the other side of the world. Hopefully they get this new one contained like they did the others. They probably will, but you would think that crazy culture with all their backward ways, would finally learn! When will they learn???
A couple days later, and the Chinese are reporting an explosion of new cases. They are very worried about stopping the spread. There is so little known about this virus… what was it called again? Oh well… never mind. It is their problem.
A few days after that, I catch the sunshiny newscasters doing their morning info-tainment with coffee routine giving this outbreak a longer segment. Turns out the virus was first spread to humans in a flea market.
A flea market?
Oh sure. A grody flea market filled with grody people. Yay! And it’s still spreading? Hmmm… Well, at least its THEM over THERE.
Wow! Look at the images of all the people wearing face masks. Yup! You gotta use those things alright.
Then the newscaster offers a second segment on the outbreak, this one interviewing Americans living “near the epicenter” as they call it.
Well, of course Americans would go there. Why? Why would you want to be an American caught up in that? That is the risk you take getting on a plane and going THERE. What business do these “Americans” have there? Teaching English???
Great. Next thing you know, they will get infected and wanna come home. That’s how they get ya! Oh, look. That person isn’t American! Not really. Oh… you married an American. A Chinese/American. Great!
Coronavirus. That’s what they are calling it. Hmmm…
My daughter comes home from school asking if I am afraid of the coronavirus. I tell her no. But I am curious why they are talking about it among kids at school. She says, well if you get it, be sure and order a lime disease with it. Coronavirus goes good with lime disease!
Ha ha ha! We get a chuckle.
Coronavirus. I have the name down now, and then on the computer news feed I find a video of the critter kept for sale in a flea market in China that carried the virus and passed it to humans. I have no idea what that creature is! Looks bizarre to me! Why would anyone want to eat that? Disgusting! WTF? F’n Chinese!
Later that night, the bedtime comic’s monolog points out that even though Americans might be grossed out at the thought of eating such a creature, we only recently quit eating Tide pods.
I am feeling uneasy about all of this. I tell my wife, order us some of those face masks. I bet in another month, there will be a run on them, and they will be hard to get. I have a feeling those weird Chinese are not getting on top of this one.
Then the next day I hear the name of the city at the epicenter AGAIN for the 100th time, and it finally sticks in my brain. Wuhan. Never heard of it before all of this, and only just now cared to commit the name of the place to memory. Did they just say this town has 12 million people??? My God!
Later that day I see a video of a Chinese drone patrolling the skies over Wuhan and a voice on the drone’s loud speaker scolding a woman for breaking the law by walking on the street without a face mask. Then I see people getting arrested for going to town to shop for food. I think to myself, THOSE F’n Chinese!
The headlines are about half devoted to the virus now. We have stories of Americans trying to board airplanes and leave China, of coming to Air Force bases in the US under quarantine, of cruise ships (Who TF gets on a cruise ship ANYTIME? Especially NOW!!!) Those stupid cruise ships are always getting sick with outbreaks. They outa make you sign a paper – a waver – saying if a bug breaks out on this ship, they will sail it to the middle of the Pacific and sink it with you on it! Idiots. Meanwhile, the Chinese are building new hospitals in two weeks time! Damn! You gotta hand it to those Chinese! THEY can do that.
And of course, the virus is no longer contained in China. In addition to all the quarantines being monitored closely at Air Bases in America, and passengers on cruise ships reporting illness, there are confirmed cases in South Korea now too. Oh boy. Once an Asian community gets it, it takes off. Right? I mean, they all live in such close quarters, sharing everything – EVERYTHNG. Probably eating weird creatures and stuff.
Now it dawns on me, I should pray.
Oh dear God, please keep the coronavirus away from us God fearing Americans. No one ever mentions it, but I feel sure President Trump’s wall will keep this out too. And certainly, if there is one person who seems unconcerned about this virus, it is God’s man in the White House, Donald Trump!
Then the next day there are reports that the virus is breaking out in Europe. Oh, God. Well, you know… those crazy Europeans have all those borders of all those countries. Hard to keep people from crossing in and out. And this coronavirus is a tricky one! You might not even suffer symptoms! But you can be carrying it and spread it soooooooo easily. Just one person on a plane can infect the whole plane! I start recalling zombie movies.
Oh wow. Zombie movies. Yeah, the infection spreads like that huh.
But Trump is still holding rallies, and those stupid Dems are holding them too. But wait, what’s this? An outbreak in Washington state?
A nursing home for the elderly? How did they get it? Oh, well, when it’s your time!
Wait, what? It hit another old folks home? Oh, God. The nurses must be carrying it! And look, the other headline is the national nurses union claiming that they are ill equipped. This isn’t looking good.
Next day it’s a community in New York.
This is Americans, but I gotta say, it’s the old and it’s those same Jews who were spreading measles just a few months ago. Serves them right!
You know what? Honey, we better stock up on toilet paper…
Next day, the whole news cast is devoted to the coronavirus. The stores are getting wiped out of supplies. ALL of the experts are clamoring to complain that the American response is too little too late, while God’s Man in the White House is trying to steady the stock market (exactly like Jesus in Jerusalem, I might add).
It’s in the military now. It’s in the TSA screeners. Where is national security at a time like this? Pray the WALL holds. I must imagine microscopic virus seething and pulsating all over the Mexican side of that WALL, and it makes me sick.
Trump AND the Dems are no longer holding rallies.
My house is turning into a germ bunker. I got my beans, my rice, my toilet paper, my water, and my Glock 9 on the top shelf in my closet.
I am ready.
I am blogging, and blaming, and scared, and praying, and the whole time, I am watching this thing beneath my contempt mercilessly marching like Creeping Death to my door.
Quick. Someone put blood on the door post! And hold a lucky rabbits foot just in case.
This is getting ugly. I am still waiting for Amazon to ship those face masks we ordered a month ago.
I just found out how deep the rot in my own heart goes. And I don’t like what I see.
Help me, Jesus!